My daily gratitude for:

1. Visits with a counselor, which was helpful to not just get a grasp of the present but to get a grasp of the past years. I appreciated my first time with my counselor and the good relationship we started.
2. The chance to participate in an Ethics committee consult and see how ethical principles are laid out practically and how to theoretically think about best interest and quality of life in a child.
3. The snuggle time I have with Ryan.
4. Good lungs that give me breath.
5. Nurses who remember me as I travel around the hospital and say a friendly hello.
6. Jessica Shannon and her energy! Happy birthday to a wonderful pediatric chaplain!
7. Positive and prophetic conversation about race and ethnicity, and Jerry Taylor’s strong role in forming my sight and thought. I am so grateful for Jerry’s influence and pastoral care to me.

My daily gratitude for:

1. Being surrounded in love by the worlds best support system.
2. Ryan’s resilience as he goes through changes and transition.
3. Having a place to sleep that is more than just, and actually like home, in this transition.
4. The right pillows. Sleep is so much better!
5. The opportunity to pursue some fun things that I really want to do. In my transition time I have some time here and there and I’m learning to tap into the things I want to try, raise my curiosity, or love doing.
6. Smiles.

My daily gratitude for:

1. My parents. They have been just amazing and present and I deeply appreciate them through this divorce process.
2. The laughter and humor on the way to Rooms To Go today. Stephen and Dawn are super fun to travel with!
3. The health to take a long walk this morning, and on top of it to walk to a donut place! I have been lucky to stay healthy.
4. Getting all the basic stuff for my apartment now, including couch, coffee table, tv stand, bed for Ryan, and TV. It feels relieving in a great way. And now I get to work on all the small things…
5. Distractions.
6. The reality of these sweet treats! Dinosaur fart cotton candy!

My daily gratitude for:

1. Edolia, the wonderful Head of School at Grace Episcopal Day School, who was welcoming and sweet and so engaged about Ryan. I am grateful for this welcoming culture at Ryan’s new school.
2. Friends who give moral support when I want to do something new.
3. Playing cards with Stephen and Dawn and having tons of fun as I do.
4. The flexibility and responsiveness of our St Lukes chaplain residents. They have been great to work with in the evenings!
5. Having Ryan tonight. In this transition time, I treasure every moment with Ryan because he is a significant part of my strength and resilience.
6. The excitement for the opening of the new Texas Children’s building, the Legacy Tower.

My daily gratitude for:

1. Will Denham, my oldest nephew and Aiden’s cousin. I love Wills gentleness and sweetness with my family and we treasure his presence and spirit. Happy 10th birthday Will!
2. Sunshine. I am always happy to see the sun every day and get energy from the bright days.
3. My colleagues who are helping give me time and space to continue working through tough emotions.
4. Leaning into my faith and Gods love to keep calm and mindful.

My daily gratitude for:

1. Nurses whose paths I have crossed who have blessed me greatly: Carly Crockett, Angela Ramer Young, Gardner Mack, Karen Morales and many others who are no longer in the PICU but have left incredible impressions with me.
2. The friends with whom I can wrestle with questions I have no answers to and will probably never have answers to.
3. Ryan’s bursting excitement and loud voice when he feels happy. As a father, there is few greater things than palpably feeling his joy exploding out.
4. Buying new furniture for the new place- its exciting for a fresh start!
5. Talking theology and faith with Cambry.
6. Bringing a surprise gift of a construction truck set to Ryan last night! I love that smile…

My daily gratitude for:

1. Jessica Vaughn and her big 30th birthday today. I am so happy to know her and be a part of her life, and particularly I marvel at her wisdom and faithfulness. She is a great parent and is a great parent to talk to and walk away feeling affirmed about my own parenthood! Happy birthday Jessica!
2. Jessica Shannon, and her energy and passion for pediatric spirituality and Texas Children’s. And another awesome friend and giant soccer fan!
3. The power of clarity to give peace and comfort.
4. The call of forgiveness when the heart tugs other ways so strongly.
5. The way God puts us in places at just the right times so that we love on others well.

My daily gratitude for:

1. My parents and all the support and love they have showered on me this week. And they have surrounded Ryan with all sorts of play, laughter, running, candy, and all other spoiling! So when they love on Ryan, by extension they love on me.
2. When Ryan sits and lays with me and helps me feel all special inside.
3. Palm trees, just cause they feel like home.
4. Bob Flory and Ryan Coleman, among others, for being people who reach out and care.
5. My brother Josh and his prayers for me and seeing his growing maturity in faith.

My daily gratitude for:

1. When friends stop and pray with me. It means so much to hear the prayers spoken on behalf of me, my family, Ryan, and my work.
2. The profound connection of friendship that is so easily rekindled when friends meet after time away. Here’s to you Cambry and Adam!
3. Fathers Office, a restaurant in Santa Monica that you need to try when you are in. Great burger!
4. The way my church and community and support system can carry my emotions while I try to acknowledge them and move forward. We as a body of Christ are charged with carrying joy for those who can’t at the moment, carrying grief when others feel weighted by it, carrying anger when someone can’t fully express it, and holding brokenness when others feel overwhelmed by it. So even when I can’t fully touch how I feel, my church and friends carry it for and with me.

My daily gratitude for:

1. The chance to see Cambry today and spend some quality time with him.
2. The incredible and enduring support of the PICU staff and the physicians I know around the hospital. I keep getting messages of encouragement and pick me ups!
3. Laughing with family! Especially about each other and making light of our own humanity.
4. Having all the details of the new apartment squared away already so I have three weeks to think about the furniture and arranging the move. It’s been nice to see what I can do when I need to be in charge.
5. Potty training Ryan with my parents- they are more than committed when Ryan is only mildly so!
6. Seeing Ryan talk to himself as he plays on his own.
7. The mild and beautiful weather in SoCal that has allowed to walk and reflect and walk more.